All the What - Ifs

In an effort to take my mind off my misery, my friend Julie tagged me to answer these much-more-enjoyable what-ifs than the ones I've been contemplating lately!

If I could be a scientist…the world would be in sad shape. Like, there would be no advances.
If I could be a farmer… I'd farm out the work.
If I could be a musician…I'd play the cello. That way I could get in a good cry everytime I practiced.
If I could be a doctor… I'd be a damn good one.
If I could be a painter… I'd think I'd gone to heaven. To be able to paint like I want to paint....ah.
If I could be a gardener…I'd love to be able to have fresh flowers in every room. And some yummy fresh food.
If I could be a missionary…I'd hate living on 'support'. I hate fundraising.
If I could be a chef…it would sure come in handy for the family. I'd create tasty, healthy, attractive entrees.
If I could be an architect…I'd meld beautiful design with 'green' technology, and no one could afford me.
If I could be a linguist…I'd go nuts.
If I could be a psychologist…I'd carry the weight of everyone's problems. But I'd be good at it.
If I could be a librarian… I'd be frustrated at all the books I'd want to read, and never have time to.
If I could be an athlete…I'd choose an extreme sport, or a funky unknown sport.
If I could be a lawyer… I'd clean up. But I'd probably lose my soul.
If I could be an inn-keeper… I'd stress out. When will all these people leave me alone?
If I could be a professor…I'd love it.
If I could be a writer…I'd capture a phrase like Forster and I'd plumb the depths like Dosteyevsky.
If I could be a llama-rider…just shoot me and put me out of my misery.
If I could be a bonnie pirate…I'd be rich and promiscuous, but I wouldn't live long.
If I could be an astronaut…I'd hate the math, but I'd love the missions.
If I could be a world famous blogger…I'd be content with that. Gotta have a forum for life.
If I could be a justice on any one court in the world…it would be a magistrate's office. Help the little people.
If I could be married to any current famous political figure…Arnold, of course.